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A university degree, a house, 2 cars, 2.5 kids, a dog or….
….or a university degree, mould infested share accommodation, a 3 wheeled skateboard, a dead goldfish and reams of tri-chord chutzpa.
How does the pseudo-artistic Converse clad conversation class expert measure personal success against the neo-classical pillars of Western achievement?
As spring approaches, and the prosperous winter season morphs into another sunbathed season of discontent, losers are forced to face not only the loss of valuable tax free teaching hours, the sudden deflux of ravenous, raven haired mountain girls (who flee Krakow with their textbooks on horseback, returning to their villages to pick strawberries and milk cows wearing long, cream polka dot dresses) but also the devastation of another winter defined by questionable creative output.
Some losers panic at the loss of classroom authority and stardom, others stare at their dusty berets and brogues, wilting at the prospect of competing against the full retail fashion purchase power of the Latin and Anglo males who converge on Krakow like starved Parakeets. For the loser, this new reality can be just too much to bear.
Some just leave. A simple glance in the faux-sooted panes of Alchemia is sometimes enough. The deep pores, sunken jowls and tar stained teeth can, for a moment, revive the forgotten senses of reality, self-worth and dignity lost under the swooning weight of an inflated ego and a Zapiekanka paunch. In one final, pathetic act, the loser shamefully shambles his way to an internet cafe, Skyping his final few euros back home to arrange a direct flight to Frankfurt for a North American connector.
But not all leave. Some choose to stay.
Believe it or not, some even stay for years, ignoring the crashing cymbals of reality, the free-falling US dollar, bank accounts receding faster than hairlines and their mother’s plea’s to return home to face the IRS. These losers continue pounding away for the unattainable, somewhat akin to a death row inmate entertaining his pet gerbil. It may feel right, it may be justifiable in so many ways, and even end with a mild rush of ecstasy, but a gerbil is still a gerbil, and an expat concert is still just a stale and gormless exercise in self-aggrandisement. It should be added that some music critics actually prefer the post-coital wail of the gerbil to any music produced in Krakow within the past 4 years!
With the veil of winter withdrawn, the mystery of the loser is revealed. Spindly, bruised and pimply legs see the sun for the first time in months. Sanguine cheeks and oily goatees do little to hide a skin texture which ironically takes the form of the coarse, grey toilet paper they have savaged their poo-chutes with for the previous year.
To survive the bitter summer months, losers need to locate a benefactor; a ‘sugar daddy’ of sorts. This may mean collaborating with a royalty receiving, one-hit-wonder, a cashed up, manic, narcissist or a bloated, freeloading, congenital liar.
At the end of the day, many options exist for losers beyond street prostitution, but in the opinion of the Losers editorial team you’re fucked either way.
Jakob
Popularity: 48% [?]
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March 6th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Left OUT
Why leave out the boozed up angry shit hangers that yearn for something other than cruelty and undermining to plan their day in order to stay in a position to get attention?
Why is it Jacob C. (or E. as we know him to be) is still waffling on about Krakow when he left it for the higher exchange rate to start the Hostel boom in another country before some other carpet bagger shows up first? I guess Krakow taught him something after all, too bad it was only about money.
Perhaps he feels alone there in his inebriated castle while being left out of the simple act of creativity with no money reward and the loving support of a group of Artists which may be too sublime to not want to control and own from afar?
Perhaps he made the wrong decision to leave, or was he chased out of town? Yes, probably both. You can only despise yourself for so long before everyone else does too.
In the final analysis creativity on any level should be encouraged. Even unbalanced and hateful critique is necessary because when you add it all up it brings with it the many facets necessary for a possible culture to form.
Critique away i say!
And rue the day
that minds don’t say
what should go away
But in the room
where you hang your hat
don’t forget
that you are where you’re at
(hey! that’s good! =:)~
It is with pleasure that i can read such a gifted mind such as J.C. and when he finally has something to really say i want to be front and center.
Until then take care of your body and your mind and surround yourself with good hearts. It just feels better than bitterness.
And for god’s sake, stop the drink for a while. Show us you can be a real man. Find what is truly bothering you, guaranteed it is not OUTSIDE of you.
zoinks,
Hugs,
b7
UJT
March 7th, 2008 at 9:44 am
JEALOUS
you are jealous blue. you wrap your mean spirited words and hateful personal insults in "mysticism" and "good will" and comments about how much you would like to see j.c. use his mind for "higher" purposes. who are you to preach? there’s more bitterness in your comments than your realise…
March 7th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Hidden
and you are?….
..hiding behind and alias or anonymity?
so i should take what you have to say as anything important?
Nope. Thank you. Not today.
Why am i (and others in the Art world in Krakow) even addressed on this site anymore? Have you NOTHING going on in your life that you need to go back in time? Go forward. Find something else to write about. Or is there nothing else? Pathetic if so.
This site could have been something. I was it’s biggest fan probably. And it has become nothing at all.
B.O.R.I.N.G.
Bye
bye
Let’s talk in 20 years. Tell me what you have created then….
Time always tells. The rest is speculation.
Go make a movie or write a myth. Just do something positive or live in the mire.
L8r Gator!,
~b
March 8th, 2008 at 3:15 am
Myths!
Myth 1
Krakows expat artists are financially independent through their ‘art’
Myth 2
Kebabs are healthy
Myth 3
Blue 7 is not living under an alias himself!
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There’s 3 myths LOSER!
March 16th, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Bloo?
No Blue comments for a week.
This site has really gone to crap.
Or maybe Bloo has…..
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
March 16th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Bloo?
No Blue comments for a week.
This site has really gone to crap.
Or maybe Bloo has…..
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!